Happy Early Anniversary

Folks, it’s that time again. Time to sink a wad of cash into another invisible farm improvement.

But I’ll splurge on this particular item. We’re pretty attached to running water.

The circuit breaker for the well tripped last week. And when the water failed a second time, Martin thought a new spigot was leaking into the well-pump wiring.

But when it kicked off again — the kitchen sink fizzling away to nothing — we called the plumber.

He cracked open a pipe in the yard and announced, “You need a new well pump.”

“Well, eventually,” he added. “The old one should hold out a little while.”

By “a little while,” I assumed he meant a few weeks, maybe a month. But the pump commit suicide 4 hours later.

That night, the water system suffered serious indigestion. The pipes whined and groaned and the sink faucet hiccuped and belched up a few bursts of water before the dry heaving set in.

There wasn’t a thimble of water in the pipes. Not a splash to rinse a toothbrush.

The plumber arrived the next day and said he could replace the pump for $1600.

For 1,600 bucks, I told Martin, I better see Old Faithful shooting from the sink. I want a geyser that strips dishes from my hand. Peels skin off in the shower.

“You’re not going to get that,” Martin said. “You’re going to get your water back. For $1600.”

I watched the plumber extract the blown pump from the ground — the device looked like a metal tube used to heat buckets of water in the barn. It was hard to believe that the thing cost the equivalent of a weekend at a swanky hotel and spa.

The upside: water has been restored to the farm.

And we no longer have to shop for anniversary gifts. Now when I flush the toilet or use the sink I’ll just say, “Hey honey, nice water pump…”